Standing Outside the Fire

But you’ve got to be tough
When consumed by desire
‘Cause it’s not enough

To stand outside the fire.

I recently met a person, surprisingly close to my age, whom I can see standing at a junction and contemplating various paths. Which one to take? The safe bet, the easy route, the unknown course or the dream? While our conversations have been casual and positive, I can sense his deep reflections. And as I am seemingly prone to do, I wonder: Is there anything I can do to help?

Why is it that I always feel the need to “rescue” people, even those who really don’t need rescuing or perhaps aren’t ready to be rescued. He has his wits about him, indeed, and even if he may be a tad confused and possibly struggling with his search, he's not sending out an SOS, least of which to some seemingly naive girl he's only recently met. Yet still I want to try. And why is that gosh darnit?

Perhaps it’s because I know and understand. I can empathize with those confusing feelings because I’ve been there many, many times: Where am I going? What am I doing? And why? How do I get there? Is this really me?

I was at those crossroads just two years ago. And while leaving the agency was one of the hardest decisions to make, it ended up being the right one. I had nothing lined up -- nothing at all. I didn't even know which other path I was going to take. I only knew that the path I was on was leading me to misery and something more, which I did not want. So I veered off, jumped the curb and somehow, with grace and dignity, landed soundly on a different path. It's a fun path, to be sure. Even still, I sometimes find myself in pensive states wondering Is this what I really want?

I sense his strong passion to want to help people – and it is a huge passion to bear. It is similar to my own purpose of wanting to make people happy and to give children a better future. How do you translate these passions into your dreams? How do you make your dreams take flight?

It’s often easy to “settle” for something we think is what we want, only to find out years later that the void is still there.

Been there. Done that. Life lesson #8,322.

It’s easy to believe that standing outside the fire is safer and can be just as fantastically fulfilling as dancing within the flames. And for some people that is the case. For those of us who feel the need for something more, who have that burning desire, it’s simply not enough to stand back and watch.

Yet still, jumping into that circle of dancing flames, risking it all, laying it on the line, wearing your heart on your sleeve…or which ever way you want to put it…is not painless and it’s certainly not without any bit of extra ordinary effort. To be sure, it is that extra bit of attitude, work, heart and desire that makes the dance inside all the more rewarding.

If you don’t risk anything, you risk so much more…

I know I cannot save a life. That is not my responsibility. And, thankfully, this is not a case where someone needs to be saved. I am finally learning that I cannot be everything to all people. But I can do other things – good things, I hope. I can support, I can encourage and above all, I can believe. I do believe.

I believe every dream deserves a chance to take flight.

And dreams can happen, if we make them happen.

So go out there and dance…dream…love…live.

Namaste,
Alikona

I cannot abide by

standing outside the fire.

Pics (top to bottom) #1: Fire pit in Lake Tahoe, April 2007. #2: Fiery sunset on 13-hour nite run, April 2007. #3 Fiery Tahoe sunset on post-Thanksgiving run, 2006. #4 Getting ready to dance, NC, June 2007.